‘Single non-white jacket’: RCMP write personal ad to find lost coat’s owner

A jacket with ‘something valuable’ in pocket was found behind North Vancouver Salvation Army

Single Non-White Jacket Seeks Lost Partner. (North Vancouver RCMP)

North Vancouver police are asking the public to help make a “romantic reunion.”

Police issued a tongue-in-cheek news release Wednesday that looked like a personal ad for a “single non-white jacket.”

“You dropped me off on that rainy night, behind the Salvation Army Thrift Store on Fell Street in North Vancouver,” the release said. “But I think you still miss me. Because you left something valuable behind, in one of my pockets. Not a scarf or pair of socks, but something much more valuable. Maybe you just wanted one last chance to hold me?”

The jacket is described as “broad shouldered and nicely tanned,” with an astrological sign of Virgo, and that it’s seeking a Scorpio who wears a size XL.

“By my guess, you’re over 40 (but you don’t look a day over 29!). You know how to treat a jacket. You never labelled me and I loved you for that. You’re clean, but not a neat-freak.”

The news release writer even goes so far as to describe the jacket’s interests.

“I love long walks on the beach and candle-lit dinners. I’m not sporty, but I’m just as comfortable at a pub as I am at the symphony.

“I’m warm, soft, formal, and low-maintenance. I don’t like labels, so nobody can tell where I’m from. I’m well put together, and have never fallen apart in public. Smooth-chested. No back hair!”

The release does not say when the jacket was discovered, but if you’re the owner, your jacket is “missing you” and you’re asked to contact North Vancouver police at 604-985-1311.



joti.grewal@bpdigital.ca

Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter

Just Posted

Komatsu announces plans for $40M, 85k-square-foot facility in Sparwood

Komatsu Mining Corp. has announced plans to develop a new 85,000-square-foot sales… Continue reading

Former Fernie Ghostrider re-signs with Vancouver Canucks

Josh Teves has signed a two-year contract with the NHL team

Motor vehicle incident in Sparwood results in death of dump truck driver

An individual has died after the dump truck they were driving went… Continue reading

Fernie chainsaw carver wins big at Logger Days

Michael Penny placed 3rd at Powell River Logger Sports, last weekend

UPDATED: RCMP confirm one death in accident

Two motorcycles ran into the back of a vehicle towing a boat trailer on highway near Cranbrook

Rich the Vegan scoots across Canada for the animals

Rich Adams is riding his push scooter across Canada to bring awareness to the dog meat trade in Asia

Canadian high school science courses behind on climate change, says UBC study

Researchers found performance on key areas varies by province and territory

Six inducted into BC Hockey Hall of Fame

The 26th ceremony in Penticton welcomed powerful figures both from on and off the ice

RCMP investigate two shootings in the Lower Mainland

Incidents happened in Surrey, with a victim being treated at Langley Memorial Hospital

CRA program to help poor file taxes yields noticeable bump in people helped

Extra money allows volunteer-driven clinics to operate year-round

Recall: Certain Pacific oysters may pose threat of paralytic shellfish poisoning

Consumers urged to either return affected packages or throw them out

How a Kamloops-born man helped put us on the moon

Jim Chamberlin did troubleshooting for the Apollo program, which led to its success

Sexual harassment complaints soaring amid ‘frat boy culture’ in Canada’s airline industry

‘It’s a #MeToo dumpster fire…and it’s exhausting for survivors’

Most Read